I know it has been a super long time since I have posted but until now not a lot has been happening. Patty has gone back out to work after having 3 months at home and so I am just getting back into the swing of doing things on my own. The twins haven't been settling too well without dad around. To say they are driving me mental is putting it nicely lol. But I will survive as per usual with a much needed day off on Saturday with my dad coming over to watch them while I help mum out with a marketstall.
Callum has been on Ritalin while he is at school since May. Things were going smoother for a while there until recently.... I'm starting to get "those" phone calls again to come and get him. Yesterday it was at 2pm they called me to come and get him because he was walking around the oval because he was frustrated. I wasn't impressed to say the least. This kid has actually come a long way. Before he used to just take off and try and come home. But anyway today I made the conscious decision to stop giving it to him because if they are calling me again it obviously isn't working. To my surprise there was no phone call.... plus he came down the stairs on his own to meet me (usually if he isn't having a good afternoon he goes to the SEC and is escorted back up). So yesterday afternoon was slightly hellish for me. Up until he went to bed it was meltdown after meltdown and I had that horrid feeling of wanting to curl up into a ball and lock myself in my room so I didn't have to deal with it. But I woke up this morning and today was a brand new day.
Now to my next topic hence the name of this post "Another long road ahead". Our youngest Noah had his first Paediatric appointment on Monday and surprise surprise he has been diagnosed with Autistic Disorder. I had a bit of a moment that I never had when Callum was diagnosed and I cried. This is my baby and I felt like a failure. With Callum it was very evident and 100% all the signs were there and was just needing confirmation where with Noah a big part of me was just hoping it was sensory issues. I was feeling ok the next morning after a long talk on the phone with his daycare mum Deb the night before because she wanted to know how it went. I have already started filling out the paperwork for Autism Queensland and for the Autism Advisor. I just need to wait for his diagnosis to be sent out in the mail. So now over the next few weeks I have a lot of work to do before my baby starts Prep and the twins go into grade 2. I wish they would stop growing up though cos time it going by way too fast!
By the way only 6 weeks until Christmas and I am one prepared Mumma!!!
Thursday, November 8, 2012
Friday, August 3, 2012
To Pull Ones Finger Out
Odd name for a blog post hey..... got your attention though lol. I know I haven't been on in a while. I've been dealing with some issues and finally "pulled my finger out" and have dealt with some of it. Tonight will seem like I start off slightly negative but by the end of this post it will be somewhat more positive. Actually totally freakin awesome because today I am proud as punch with my son.
So everyone knows the deal. Callum is 6 and has Autism. He has been doing half days at school all year because he has been too hard for his school to handle. Mid May, Pat and I decided to put him on medication to help him focus more at school which has worked. But, up until the end of term 2 and the first week of term 3 he was doing half days. Thus if you work it out he has missed a whole term of school. For the first half of this year I have felt so alone (even though I have been surrounded by so many fabulous family and friends). Had a lot of pity party moments (which I am seriously not a huge fan of), and was just getting the shits with everything in general and but didn't feel confident enough to do a whole lot about it.
Then on the second day of term 3 I got Callum's school report card. He had on it an "E" for english and behaviour and the rest was an "N" which meant he couldn't be marked on it because he hadn't done the work or been at school long enough to do it. After taking the night to think about how I was going to speak to someone at the school and gaining some form of rational composure like a mature adult would, the next day I went up and saw the Principal. I felt so nervous like I was in school in trouble lol. But this was a huge issue for me. If his report card looked like this now, how was it going to look in a couple of years time? I explained to him that I felt that my son was slipping through the system and wasn't getting the education that he deserved because he was only going half days. The conversation went on for quite a bit longer but for some reason I walked out of there for some reason feeling like I hadn't accomplished much.
How wrong was I?
The next week Callum was at school until 1.30pm for the week and then the next he started going full days. I can tell you right now he is going absolutely fantastic. A lot better than what anyone even myself thought he would go. He is slowly catching up on work he missed and is now actually playing PE and loving it!
Now for the proud moment. Today was junior assembly at school and I went along and watched my son get up on parade and receive 2 awards. One for sports participation and the other for his school work. He has come such a long way in the last couple of weeks. I am so glad I actually "pulled my finger out" and did the meeting with the school that I absolutely dreaded doing. Way To GO Callum!!!
So everyone knows the deal. Callum is 6 and has Autism. He has been doing half days at school all year because he has been too hard for his school to handle. Mid May, Pat and I decided to put him on medication to help him focus more at school which has worked. But, up until the end of term 2 and the first week of term 3 he was doing half days. Thus if you work it out he has missed a whole term of school. For the first half of this year I have felt so alone (even though I have been surrounded by so many fabulous family and friends). Had a lot of pity party moments (which I am seriously not a huge fan of), and was just getting the shits with everything in general and but didn't feel confident enough to do a whole lot about it.
Then on the second day of term 3 I got Callum's school report card. He had on it an "E" for english and behaviour and the rest was an "N" which meant he couldn't be marked on it because he hadn't done the work or been at school long enough to do it. After taking the night to think about how I was going to speak to someone at the school and gaining some form of rational composure like a mature adult would, the next day I went up and saw the Principal. I felt so nervous like I was in school in trouble lol. But this was a huge issue for me. If his report card looked like this now, how was it going to look in a couple of years time? I explained to him that I felt that my son was slipping through the system and wasn't getting the education that he deserved because he was only going half days. The conversation went on for quite a bit longer but for some reason I walked out of there for some reason feeling like I hadn't accomplished much.
How wrong was I?
The next week Callum was at school until 1.30pm for the week and then the next he started going full days. I can tell you right now he is going absolutely fantastic. A lot better than what anyone even myself thought he would go. He is slowly catching up on work he missed and is now actually playing PE and loving it!
Now for the proud moment. Today was junior assembly at school and I went along and watched my son get up on parade and receive 2 awards. One for sports participation and the other for his school work. He has come such a long way in the last couple of weeks. I am so glad I actually "pulled my finger out" and did the meeting with the school that I absolutely dreaded doing. Way To GO Callum!!!
Thursday, May 31, 2012
Calm Blue Ocean
Whoa what a month I am having. I know I have been quiet over the last few weeks but soooooooooo much has been happening and I am totally exhausted. Now where to start. Oh yes I have self diagnosed myself with needing a holiday. I'm worn out, my skin feels like crap, my hair feels like crap and my body is just telling me to sleep lol. I am one worn out mumma!!!
Callum has decided that he doesn't need to go to sleep when he is told to. Slightly frustrating for me as after 7.30pm this is MY TIME. Most parents do it. It's the couple of hours before we go to bed where we can chill out and get things done that need to be done. My son feels there is no need for this. Last night he decided that he would eventually fall asleep at 10.30pm and that was only because I had had enough, turned all the lights out in the house and went to bed myself. He was then slightly surprised when I woke him up at 6.30am when I got up. Hopefully tonight he might be a little bit more understanding with going to bed earlier. His sleeping pattern has become out of whack since the last school holidays but last night I was on the verge of losing my cool big time.
A couple of weeks ago Callum had his paedeatric appointment and we made the huge decision to medicate him to help him with concentration levels at school. Please don't feel that we have decided to take the easy way out as I felt like the biggest most horrible parent in the world when I first started giving it to him. But alas. School has gotten a lot easier for him to handle and he is actually doing more work than what he has been allocated. He actually got an award for a great week at school last week. I nearly cried. It was the first week the whole year where I didn't hear "Callum did this" or "Callum did that". One of the proudest moments I have had in a long time. He is actually sitting at his desk and doing his work. Interacting in class activities and doing what he's told. His hours are slowly being extended at school and he is being transitioned into the next stages of what needs to happen. I don't give it to him on weekends because it is purely to help him concentrate at school.
So Patty is halfway through a swing at work and I'm back to doing it on my own for a while. Me and the 3 munchkins. Thankfully the way his shifts are layed out he will be home for school holidays WHOOHOO!!! I am off to do a market this weekend with the things I have been making so that will be a few hours break I get and Grandad will be watching them. Poor grandad lol. I hope he makes it out of my madhouse lol.
Callum has decided that he doesn't need to go to sleep when he is told to. Slightly frustrating for me as after 7.30pm this is MY TIME. Most parents do it. It's the couple of hours before we go to bed where we can chill out and get things done that need to be done. My son feels there is no need for this. Last night he decided that he would eventually fall asleep at 10.30pm and that was only because I had had enough, turned all the lights out in the house and went to bed myself. He was then slightly surprised when I woke him up at 6.30am when I got up. Hopefully tonight he might be a little bit more understanding with going to bed earlier. His sleeping pattern has become out of whack since the last school holidays but last night I was on the verge of losing my cool big time.
A couple of weeks ago Callum had his paedeatric appointment and we made the huge decision to medicate him to help him with concentration levels at school. Please don't feel that we have decided to take the easy way out as I felt like the biggest most horrible parent in the world when I first started giving it to him. But alas. School has gotten a lot easier for him to handle and he is actually doing more work than what he has been allocated. He actually got an award for a great week at school last week. I nearly cried. It was the first week the whole year where I didn't hear "Callum did this" or "Callum did that". One of the proudest moments I have had in a long time. He is actually sitting at his desk and doing his work. Interacting in class activities and doing what he's told. His hours are slowly being extended at school and he is being transitioned into the next stages of what needs to happen. I don't give it to him on weekends because it is purely to help him concentrate at school.
So Patty is halfway through a swing at work and I'm back to doing it on my own for a while. Me and the 3 munchkins. Thankfully the way his shifts are layed out he will be home for school holidays WHOOHOO!!! I am off to do a market this weekend with the things I have been making so that will be a few hours break I get and Grandad will be watching them. Poor grandad lol. I hope he makes it out of my madhouse lol.
Thursday, May 3, 2012
Don't judge anyone before you walk a mile in their shoes...
I am a Mum
I love my 3 beautiful kids
I love my husband
I love to sew
I love tattoos
I love to create
I love my Mum and Dad
I love my Brother and Sister
I love my Nieces and Nephews and all of my extended family
I love my friends
I lend a hand when it is needed
I live life with a smile even though quite a bit of the time that is not always how I feel
I have a husband who works away from home
I have a son with Autism
I love the way his mind works sometimes
I love the hugs and kisses I get from all 3 of the kids
I sometimes get a feeling of frustration
I sometimes wonder how long will it be before I get the much needed break I wish I could have
I wish I could be supermum
I wish someone could wave a magic wand and everything would be perfect
I wish that I could sometimes put myself before everyone else
You see that mum in the shopping centre. She is the one with the kid who is fixated on something on the shelf and she can't get him to move. The trip started off fantastic but over time with the fluro lights and the noise of a busy shopping centre, he starts to act out. You sit there and think to youself oh my god I wish she would just slap that kid. You don't know he has Autism. He doesn't "Look" like he has Autism. Sometimes all she probably wants is for someone to say "do you need a hand with anything?".
I used to be one of those people before I had Callum. I was naive and had no idea what Autism was. Now I understand. Noone else will ever know what I go through because they aren't me. Every single child is different. Same as I will never know what any other parent really goes through. Our children experience different difficulties in life, different obsessions, have different triggers and view the world from a very different way to what we do. I am at the beginning. Cal is 6. I have a looooooong way to go before the hardness really sets in which is teenagehood. But at the end of the day every parent wants that feeling of accomplishment with their children. He is going to need a lot of help throughout his schooling life and I know I have the patience to help him. Why? Because I am his mum and it is my job to provide as much support for him as I can.
I get down. I have moments where I just wish the world would swallow me up and I can start all over again. But I soldier on. The meltdowns and the obsessions I am slowly getting used to but is still a never ending battle. I really wish I knew what runs through his mind. What he was thinking and how he processes things. As harder work as he is and I know he will be, I couldn't live without him. Well to put it better no matter how shitty my day gets I couldn't live without any of them.
I love my 3 beautiful kids
I love my husband
I love to sew
I love tattoos
I love to create
I love my Mum and Dad
I love my Brother and Sister
I love my Nieces and Nephews and all of my extended family
I love my friends
I lend a hand when it is needed
I live life with a smile even though quite a bit of the time that is not always how I feel
I have a husband who works away from home
I have a son with Autism
I love the way his mind works sometimes
I love the hugs and kisses I get from all 3 of the kids
I sometimes get a feeling of frustration
I sometimes wonder how long will it be before I get the much needed break I wish I could have
I wish I could be supermum
I wish someone could wave a magic wand and everything would be perfect
I wish that I could sometimes put myself before everyone else
You see that mum in the shopping centre. She is the one with the kid who is fixated on something on the shelf and she can't get him to move. The trip started off fantastic but over time with the fluro lights and the noise of a busy shopping centre, he starts to act out. You sit there and think to youself oh my god I wish she would just slap that kid. You don't know he has Autism. He doesn't "Look" like he has Autism. Sometimes all she probably wants is for someone to say "do you need a hand with anything?".
I used to be one of those people before I had Callum. I was naive and had no idea what Autism was. Now I understand. Noone else will ever know what I go through because they aren't me. Every single child is different. Same as I will never know what any other parent really goes through. Our children experience different difficulties in life, different obsessions, have different triggers and view the world from a very different way to what we do. I am at the beginning. Cal is 6. I have a looooooong way to go before the hardness really sets in which is teenagehood. But at the end of the day every parent wants that feeling of accomplishment with their children. He is going to need a lot of help throughout his schooling life and I know I have the patience to help him. Why? Because I am his mum and it is my job to provide as much support for him as I can.
I get down. I have moments where I just wish the world would swallow me up and I can start all over again. But I soldier on. The meltdowns and the obsessions I am slowly getting used to but is still a never ending battle. I really wish I knew what runs through his mind. What he was thinking and how he processes things. As harder work as he is and I know he will be, I couldn't live without him. Well to put it better no matter how shitty my day gets I couldn't live without any of them.
Tuesday, April 24, 2012
Ahhhhhhh I just don't care
Ever had one of those days where you wish you just didn't give a crap about anything? I'm having one of those days. No seriously I am. I got up at stupid o'clock, had a couple of cups of coffee, relatively cleaned the house and did sweet nothing for the rest of the day. Twins went to school, Noah went to daycare. I had 2 and a half hours before Cal needed to be picked up. Did some groceries, came home and did nothing.....
I had so much I had to do today but it felt good to not worry about anything.
I had every intention of sewing together a cubby house for the kids to go over the kitchen table. I haven't even picked out what fabric I am using yet or what is going to go on it.
Everyone deserves a lazy day. Having say that my morning was somewhat constructive until about 8am lol. A day to just chill out and not give a hoot about what anyone thinks or what you have to do for the day. I successfully spent my day drinking coffee, playing games on facebook, doing a spot of shopping on one of my favorite websites aaaaand thats about all.
Why am I bragging about this?
Because it isn't very often I get to do this.
My life can be somewhat tiring and full of me being worried about everything. Majority of the time I thrive on stress and it's nice to have a day where I just don't care.
Tomorrow however, will be a totally different story. We are off to the park for the day! The kids will have a ball and Pat and I will be both exhausted by the time the day ends :)
I had so much I had to do today but it felt good to not worry about anything.
I had every intention of sewing together a cubby house for the kids to go over the kitchen table. I haven't even picked out what fabric I am using yet or what is going to go on it.
Everyone deserves a lazy day. Having say that my morning was somewhat constructive until about 8am lol. A day to just chill out and not give a hoot about what anyone thinks or what you have to do for the day. I successfully spent my day drinking coffee, playing games on facebook, doing a spot of shopping on one of my favorite websites aaaaand thats about all.
Why am I bragging about this?
Because it isn't very often I get to do this.
My life can be somewhat tiring and full of me being worried about everything. Majority of the time I thrive on stress and it's nice to have a day where I just don't care.
Tomorrow however, will be a totally different story. We are off to the park for the day! The kids will have a ball and Pat and I will be both exhausted by the time the day ends :)
Tuesday, April 17, 2012
I survived
I know I haven't blogged for a couple of weeks but I've been surviving school Easter Holidays lol. This blog is proof I survived. At first I was like "YAY!" no school runs 3 times a day, no listening to the lack of progress that my son is making at school, I can just chill with the kidlets. Well that novelty wore off by the end of the first weekend.
I forgot how unstructured school holidays are in comparison to a normal school day. But they all got bored very quickly. Pat was at work for most of the school holidays (perfect timing lol). There is only so many fun filled public activities that I can handle without feeling the need to drink half a bottle of vodka by the time I get home. Please note that I didn't drink throughout the holidays however tempted I was to do so. I decided to start sewing instead. It helped me to destress. Mind you a couple of months ago I was seriously not the sewing type. I thought I would just do it for something to do. So my choice was either sew or drink..... thats what it boiled down to throughout most of the fortnight they had off lol. That was my escape. A good one at that.
On the first Tuesday our youngest went to daycare so I decided to take the twins to cinema. All was good until I then found out the session I had turned up for was in 3d. So it was either see the movie in 3d or wait another hour at the movies for the next one to start. PASS!!! Here we have our first 3d movie experience seeing The Lorax. (sorry the picture isnt too crash hot it was taken on my iPhone.)
We had a ball! Went so much better than I had imagined! Was so funny when Rhiannon tried to grab images that she thought were coming out at her. Except for Cal being slightly overstimulated before the movie we did pretty well.
On the two Thursdays of the holidays I put the twins into care for the day so I could have a break. By god I needed it. A huge thank you to Kath for taking them for the day.
So poor little Cal has had to deal with a huge whack to his routine over the holidays and thats where the "I don't want to go to sleep" started....... fun fun. Idiot me decided to have a movie night with the kids and let them stay up instead of their usual 7.30pm bedtime. BIG MISTAKE!!! It is now a week on and I am still trying to get Cal back into sleeping routine. He is getting better though we are down to 8.30pm he finally goes to sleep as opposed to 11pm lol.
This week is back to school. So far no good. First day he refused to do any work whatsoever (but when I brought him home at 11.30am I managed to get him to do some homework). Yesterday we nearly got a phonecall because he was being disruptive. Honestly I'm not actually holding high hopes for him being there until I am meant to pick him up this morning.
So by the looks of it..... I'm back to square one. On the bright side he has finally got an appointment with DSQ to have an assessment done so we can get some help at all. But his education currently isn't looking overly fantastic. I'm back to the drawing board with this one.
Well I am off for the morning to clean my house that my children have ripped through like a tornado over the holidays lol.
Cheers :)
I forgot how unstructured school holidays are in comparison to a normal school day. But they all got bored very quickly. Pat was at work for most of the school holidays (perfect timing lol). There is only so many fun filled public activities that I can handle without feeling the need to drink half a bottle of vodka by the time I get home. Please note that I didn't drink throughout the holidays however tempted I was to do so. I decided to start sewing instead. It helped me to destress. Mind you a couple of months ago I was seriously not the sewing type. I thought I would just do it for something to do. So my choice was either sew or drink..... thats what it boiled down to throughout most of the fortnight they had off lol. That was my escape. A good one at that.
On the first Tuesday our youngest went to daycare so I decided to take the twins to cinema. All was good until I then found out the session I had turned up for was in 3d. So it was either see the movie in 3d or wait another hour at the movies for the next one to start. PASS!!! Here we have our first 3d movie experience seeing The Lorax. (sorry the picture isnt too crash hot it was taken on my iPhone.)
We had a ball! Went so much better than I had imagined! Was so funny when Rhiannon tried to grab images that she thought were coming out at her. Except for Cal being slightly overstimulated before the movie we did pretty well.
On the two Thursdays of the holidays I put the twins into care for the day so I could have a break. By god I needed it. A huge thank you to Kath for taking them for the day.
So poor little Cal has had to deal with a huge whack to his routine over the holidays and thats where the "I don't want to go to sleep" started....... fun fun. Idiot me decided to have a movie night with the kids and let them stay up instead of their usual 7.30pm bedtime. BIG MISTAKE!!! It is now a week on and I am still trying to get Cal back into sleeping routine. He is getting better though we are down to 8.30pm he finally goes to sleep as opposed to 11pm lol.
This week is back to school. So far no good. First day he refused to do any work whatsoever (but when I brought him home at 11.30am I managed to get him to do some homework). Yesterday we nearly got a phonecall because he was being disruptive. Honestly I'm not actually holding high hopes for him being there until I am meant to pick him up this morning.
So by the looks of it..... I'm back to square one. On the bright side he has finally got an appointment with DSQ to have an assessment done so we can get some help at all. But his education currently isn't looking overly fantastic. I'm back to the drawing board with this one.
Well I am off for the morning to clean my house that my children have ripped through like a tornado over the holidays lol.
Cheers :)
Monday, April 2, 2012
World Autism Day
Today, 2nd of April, is World Autism Day. Where we all put in our part to promote Autism Awareness. For me it is a day I celebrate the little things that we as parents take for granted. Try to push the meltdowns and the problems with school to the back of my mind and take note of the little things that I treasure with my Autism Angel. The fact that every night when I tuck him into bed he jumps back out of bed to give me a kiss and a hug, the "I love you" I get from him all the time. He is a gorgeous little boy who lives with Autism.
Our stats still stand at 1 in 110 kids are diagnosed with Autism where the new stats from the USA is 1 in 88. So what exactly is it. So many of you read my blog but do you all know exactly what it is? This is going to be MY way of promoting Autism Awareness. For starters every single child with Autism is different (I am sure if they were all the same it would make it somewhat easier on us parents lol). They do not look any different to any other child you may meet in the street and there is a possibility that you might not even know that they live with it. One other thing you cannot catch it it is not a disease.
Wikipedia defines Autism as:-
"Autism is a disorder of neural development characterized by impaired social interaction and communication, and by restricted and repetitive behavior. Autism affects information processing in the brain by altering how nerve cells and their synapses connect and organize; how this occurs is not well understood."
Basically kids with Autism can have, sensory, communication and social interaction problems which can affect them and we don't know why it happens.
There are three classifications of the Autistic Spectrum that people (I say people because in rare cases adults can be diagnosed with Autism as well however normally picked up in childhood) and these are
So what makes Callum have Autistic Disorder?
When Callum was younger he started showing a lot of repetitive behaviour. Things like lining up his cars or toys, having to have the same colour cup or plate or bowl, sitting in the same spot every time he sat at the table. We kind of thought ohh yeah that must be just some kind of little quirk that he has. It wasn't until he had grommets/tubes put in his ears that we really started to notice the sensory issues relating to noise that he had. He couldn't hear much before so noise didn't bother him. We took him to a Wiggles concert at the age of 4....... we haven't done it again lol. Other things like when he eats spaghetti bolognaise he will only eat the pasta with grated cheese as he doesn't like the texture of the meat and sauce in his mouth.
Everything is literal. When he was sleeping on a mattress on the floor (he had a meltdown and broke his bed and was unrepairable) I would tell him to go to bed and he would then inform me that he doesn't have a bed. When he would ask me where I was going I used to say as a joke I was going to the moon.... I don't do that anymore only to his sister hahaha.
They are funny little quirky things that I absolutely love about this kid and it makes me smile. He can transform one of those $100 Bumblebee Transformers that us as adults need the instructions for and still can't get it. Some of the things he can do is just mind blowing. Trust me though I am certainly not saying that having a child with Autism is all rainbows and daisies. It is hard work.
So today I take my hat off to every parent who has a child with Autism. If I could give each and every single one of you a medal I would (or a glass of wine whichever works lol).
Our stats still stand at 1 in 110 kids are diagnosed with Autism where the new stats from the USA is 1 in 88. So what exactly is it. So many of you read my blog but do you all know exactly what it is? This is going to be MY way of promoting Autism Awareness. For starters every single child with Autism is different (I am sure if they were all the same it would make it somewhat easier on us parents lol). They do not look any different to any other child you may meet in the street and there is a possibility that you might not even know that they live with it. One other thing you cannot catch it it is not a disease.
Wikipedia defines Autism as:-
"Autism is a disorder of neural development characterized by impaired social interaction and communication, and by restricted and repetitive behavior. Autism affects information processing in the brain by altering how nerve cells and their synapses connect and organize; how this occurs is not well understood."
Basically kids with Autism can have, sensory, communication and social interaction problems which can affect them and we don't know why it happens.
There are three classifications of the Autistic Spectrum that people (I say people because in rare cases adults can be diagnosed with Autism as well however normally picked up in childhood) and these are
- Autistic Disorder
- Asperger Syndrome
- Pervasive Developmental Disorder-Not Otherwise Specified (commonly abbreviated as PDD-NOS), which is diagnosed when the full set of criteria for autism or Asperger syndrome are not met.
So what makes Callum have Autistic Disorder?
When Callum was younger he started showing a lot of repetitive behaviour. Things like lining up his cars or toys, having to have the same colour cup or plate or bowl, sitting in the same spot every time he sat at the table. We kind of thought ohh yeah that must be just some kind of little quirk that he has. It wasn't until he had grommets/tubes put in his ears that we really started to notice the sensory issues relating to noise that he had. He couldn't hear much before so noise didn't bother him. We took him to a Wiggles concert at the age of 4....... we haven't done it again lol. Other things like when he eats spaghetti bolognaise he will only eat the pasta with grated cheese as he doesn't like the texture of the meat and sauce in his mouth.
Everything is literal. When he was sleeping on a mattress on the floor (he had a meltdown and broke his bed and was unrepairable) I would tell him to go to bed and he would then inform me that he doesn't have a bed. When he would ask me where I was going I used to say as a joke I was going to the moon.... I don't do that anymore only to his sister hahaha.
They are funny little quirky things that I absolutely love about this kid and it makes me smile. He can transform one of those $100 Bumblebee Transformers that us as adults need the instructions for and still can't get it. Some of the things he can do is just mind blowing. Trust me though I am certainly not saying that having a child with Autism is all rainbows and daisies. It is hard work.
So today I take my hat off to every parent who has a child with Autism. If I could give each and every single one of you a medal I would (or a glass of wine whichever works lol).
Wednesday, March 28, 2012
Its a nasty circle
Well its official. I am back to square one..... Yesterday Callum sat the test to see if he could go to a Special Education school and he's too smart to go. When I spoke to his teacher the other day she basically outlined to me that he gets babysat at school. Also talked to another teacher in the SEC and she told me that if he regresses after the school holidays he will go back to going an hour a day. What is the point? I think I am about to make one of the hardest decisions in my life..... Homeschooling.
Yesterday before he did this test he was having a massive meltdown and was crying. I was the only one that could calm him down. He did the test for about 10 minutes before he started losing interest and concentration. I don't know what to do. I am back to the beginning. I am starting to feel that since he is home most of the time anyway then I might as well school him from here. I am frustrated and angry. I don't want my son to end up being another kid that slips through the system. He will if something isn't done now. It feels like he has been put in the too hard basket. I knew my week with Pat going back to work was going to be hard but I forgot how much more exhausting it was going to be. So we are in the middle. Not coping at a mainstream school and too smart to go to a special school. Why can there not be any "inbetween" schools? 1 out of 110 children are diagnosed with different levels of Autism. So of a school of lets say 900 kids thats at least 8. Why are there kids slipping through?
I just want my angel to be happy and get an education. I want to be able to stress less but I can see that it isnt going to happen any time soon. If only life was a tad easier for both of us......
Now to go and pick him up from school because it is coming up to 11.30.
Yesterday before he did this test he was having a massive meltdown and was crying. I was the only one that could calm him down. He did the test for about 10 minutes before he started losing interest and concentration. I don't know what to do. I am back to the beginning. I am starting to feel that since he is home most of the time anyway then I might as well school him from here. I am frustrated and angry. I don't want my son to end up being another kid that slips through the system. He will if something isn't done now. It feels like he has been put in the too hard basket. I knew my week with Pat going back to work was going to be hard but I forgot how much more exhausting it was going to be. So we are in the middle. Not coping at a mainstream school and too smart to go to a special school. Why can there not be any "inbetween" schools? 1 out of 110 children are diagnosed with different levels of Autism. So of a school of lets say 900 kids thats at least 8. Why are there kids slipping through?
I just want my angel to be happy and get an education. I want to be able to stress less but I can see that it isnt going to happen any time soon. If only life was a tad easier for both of us......
Now to go and pick him up from school because it is coming up to 11.30.
Monday, March 19, 2012
For Gods sake someone wave that magic wand!
It is official.... I hate my phone..... That gorgeous little Panasonic instrument that helps me to communicate.... I hate it. Sick of constantly being on it chasing things that aren't going to get anywhere any faster. Sick of trying to find services that I am finding out very quickly are extremely expensive. The system is failing all of us and it isn't fair. Yes this is going to be a bit of a rant so if you think you might be offended then stop reading now.
I know I am not alone. After watching the article on A Current Affair last night with the Autism Forum I very much realised that I am not alone. It's not fair. I have a gorgeous little 6 year old boy that is a huge part of my world and he is suffering. So many times I feel like I have failed him and it makes me feel like absolute crap. He is 6. He is just a little boy. Due to his school lacking knowledge on how to deal with him he now has the DANGER tag on him. When I did the workshops last week I learned so much about how to deal with his behaviour and it was amazing. It did cost me money but I would be willing to do anything to help him as any parent would with their child. If I hear "he's just being a naughty boy" one more time out of someone at his school I'm going to explode. He doesn't understand emotions or feelings and it brings me to tears knowing he doesn't even know what makes him happy because he doesn't understand the word. This is something a psychologist that we are seeing is helping him with but for a price. $220 for a 1 hour session. That's $3.66 per minute. By god it's worth it but at the moment we have to wait for Pat to return to work out at sea so Callum can go to another session. I can't pull that much money out of my arse every fortnight.
Why is our government not helping us? This diagnosis has been around since 1943 so why are we all still struggling so bad. 1 out of 110 people in Australia are on the spectrum and that is just the ones that have been officially diagnosed. Why has everything stopped since Callum started mainstream school fulltime? When he was still doing 2 days at special school, he got session blocks of speech therapy and occupational therapy. Now he gets nothing because he is at a mainstream school fulltime. So what because he's at school fulltime he's cured and doesn't need any of this anymore? What a load of crap (actually that is one of the nicer words I choose to use). He barely talked until he was 4 years old. Of course he is still going to need speech therapy. Ahh but we can still have it for a price. Occupational therapy. His main trigger is writing and cutting at school (along with the other 90% of kids with Autism). He needs help strengthening the muscles in his wrist hence the OT. Both of these services I was getting last year have stopped. Shit he must be cured.
Trying to get money out of DSQ for all of this is hard to. Sure I need a break. A one way ticket to Hawaii looks really good some days but in reality all I want to do is help my son. When his paediatrician can't even give me the correct terminology on his diagnosis sheet and then stuffs me around trying to get the right ones, it's days like that I wish someone would wave a magic wand and make it all better. I am my son's advocate. He is just a 6 year old little boy. I have to fight for him. The system is failing us big time and I can completely understand why there are parents moving overseas because there are better services.
Currently all I (and I'm sure a lot of parents with a child with a disability) get for being the main caregiver for my child is a whopping big $114 a fortnight. A huge 34cents an hour. As I said in my last blog the money isn't too crash hot but the benefits outweigh that. I am one of the lucky ones who's child does show them affection and I get lots of hugs and kisses. I am so grateful for that. The rest of the world around me shits me to tears. If I stay on here much longer I could rant forever and being angry all the time isn't good for anyone. I don't want pity I just want help. This journey isn't going to get any easier and I know that.
I know I am not alone. After watching the article on A Current Affair last night with the Autism Forum I very much realised that I am not alone. It's not fair. I have a gorgeous little 6 year old boy that is a huge part of my world and he is suffering. So many times I feel like I have failed him and it makes me feel like absolute crap. He is 6. He is just a little boy. Due to his school lacking knowledge on how to deal with him he now has the DANGER tag on him. When I did the workshops last week I learned so much about how to deal with his behaviour and it was amazing. It did cost me money but I would be willing to do anything to help him as any parent would with their child. If I hear "he's just being a naughty boy" one more time out of someone at his school I'm going to explode. He doesn't understand emotions or feelings and it brings me to tears knowing he doesn't even know what makes him happy because he doesn't understand the word. This is something a psychologist that we are seeing is helping him with but for a price. $220 for a 1 hour session. That's $3.66 per minute. By god it's worth it but at the moment we have to wait for Pat to return to work out at sea so Callum can go to another session. I can't pull that much money out of my arse every fortnight.
Why is our government not helping us? This diagnosis has been around since 1943 so why are we all still struggling so bad. 1 out of 110 people in Australia are on the spectrum and that is just the ones that have been officially diagnosed. Why has everything stopped since Callum started mainstream school fulltime? When he was still doing 2 days at special school, he got session blocks of speech therapy and occupational therapy. Now he gets nothing because he is at a mainstream school fulltime. So what because he's at school fulltime he's cured and doesn't need any of this anymore? What a load of crap (actually that is one of the nicer words I choose to use). He barely talked until he was 4 years old. Of course he is still going to need speech therapy. Ahh but we can still have it for a price. Occupational therapy. His main trigger is writing and cutting at school (along with the other 90% of kids with Autism). He needs help strengthening the muscles in his wrist hence the OT. Both of these services I was getting last year have stopped. Shit he must be cured.
Trying to get money out of DSQ for all of this is hard to. Sure I need a break. A one way ticket to Hawaii looks really good some days but in reality all I want to do is help my son. When his paediatrician can't even give me the correct terminology on his diagnosis sheet and then stuffs me around trying to get the right ones, it's days like that I wish someone would wave a magic wand and make it all better. I am my son's advocate. He is just a 6 year old little boy. I have to fight for him. The system is failing us big time and I can completely understand why there are parents moving overseas because there are better services.
Currently all I (and I'm sure a lot of parents with a child with a disability) get for being the main caregiver for my child is a whopping big $114 a fortnight. A huge 34cents an hour. As I said in my last blog the money isn't too crash hot but the benefits outweigh that. I am one of the lucky ones who's child does show them affection and I get lots of hugs and kisses. I am so grateful for that. The rest of the world around me shits me to tears. If I stay on here much longer I could rant forever and being angry all the time isn't good for anyone. I don't want pity I just want help. This journey isn't going to get any easier and I know that.
Friday, March 16, 2012
Dont be afraid and dont feel guilty
In my last post I talked about that feeling of wanting to give up. Don't. You are such a strong person and you don't even realize it. When you're at the end of your tether and it feels like everything is falling apart don't be afraid to ask for help. As parents we don't have super powers (even though some times the kids think I'm magic which is pretty cute), we don't have every single answer to every single question that is brought to us. DON'T BE AFRAID TO ASK FOR HELP! I have always been the kind of person (and I still am) that puts everyone before me. I have always been there to help anyone who needed a hand. It doesn't bother me because that's the kind of person I am. Over the last few weeks though I have thought to myself "when am I ever going to come first?". A wave of guilt came over me. I have a son with Autism plus 2 other children that completely depend on me for a lot of the time and it would be totally selfish of me to worry about me...... Well how wrong was I..... I lost it. I was a blubbering mess with a slightness of pity party starting (anyone who knows me knows I hate that game). But it has become better. I found a hobby which I absolutely love and that's my time for me. Reason being if we don't take time out for ourselves as parents and we fizzle out then the whole house falls apart. It's true I watched it happen in my own home. I did get to a stage where it was like if I just smile and pretend that nothing was wrong then I was going to be fine. Then my world came crashing down around me. I am human after all. At the end of the day something has to give and every parent deserves something resembling a break. Don't feel guilty about it. The world will not end if you take a few hours or even a weekend out for yourself. It may be just the thing you need.
Thursday, March 15, 2012
Information is the key
For all of us parents with children with any form of disability, not just Autism, our job is primarily to care, nurture and advocate for them because they can't do it themselves. Even just our kids in general. Being a parent is a lifelong employment opportunity and lets face it the pay isn't overly fantastic but the benefits outweigh that. But what happens when it gets too much? What happens when you do have that time when you just want to have a break down and give up? Trust me it does happen. It happens to a lot of us. In most cases when you hold that gorgeous baby in your arms you are nowhere near able to predict the events that are going to take place on a daily basis for the rest of your life.
As a parent of a child (possibly 2) with Autism, on top of the usual chef, laundromat and cleaner that mums are, I am also a researcher and advocate for my son. Finding the right information is essential. I already know a lot about sensory issues but there is always room for more information.
Yesterday I did two workshops at Autism Queensland and honestly they blew my mind. Seriously if you are a parent in Queensland I really do highly recommend their workshops no matter what age your child with Autism or Aspergers is. I learnt so much helpful information with for one what ASD is and what it means and how to deal with Challenging Behaviour. The main thing I learnt yesterday is that behaviour = communication. It's not that Callum is being a 'little turd' so to speak but it is his way of communicating that there is something he can't handle, he needs help and basically that something isn't quite right. They helped me identify his triggers and what to use to motivate Cal. I was so grateful also for all the teachers I saw there yesterday. These women and men are the lovely people who are there to educate our kids and they need this info just as much as we do.
So if you have a place like AQ that you can get info or help from USE IT! That's what they're there for. I definately walked out of there yesterday feeling more positive and feeling more able to cope. I was even still positive with the peak hour traffic I got to drive home in lol.
Here are some links below for Autism Support Services throughout each state in Australia
Autism Queensland
Autism Spectrum Australia
Autism Western Australia
Autism South Australia
Autism Tasmania
Autism Northern Territory
Autism Aspergers Advocacy Australia
I am doing more research to find other sources as well a bit later. Hope you all find some of these links highly useful :)
As a parent of a child (possibly 2) with Autism, on top of the usual chef, laundromat and cleaner that mums are, I am also a researcher and advocate for my son. Finding the right information is essential. I already know a lot about sensory issues but there is always room for more information.
Yesterday I did two workshops at Autism Queensland and honestly they blew my mind. Seriously if you are a parent in Queensland I really do highly recommend their workshops no matter what age your child with Autism or Aspergers is. I learnt so much helpful information with for one what ASD is and what it means and how to deal with Challenging Behaviour. The main thing I learnt yesterday is that behaviour = communication. It's not that Callum is being a 'little turd' so to speak but it is his way of communicating that there is something he can't handle, he needs help and basically that something isn't quite right. They helped me identify his triggers and what to use to motivate Cal. I was so grateful also for all the teachers I saw there yesterday. These women and men are the lovely people who are there to educate our kids and they need this info just as much as we do.
So if you have a place like AQ that you can get info or help from USE IT! That's what they're there for. I definately walked out of there yesterday feeling more positive and feeling more able to cope. I was even still positive with the peak hour traffic I got to drive home in lol.
Here are some links below for Autism Support Services throughout each state in Australia
Autism Queensland
Autism Spectrum Australia
Autism Western Australia
Autism South Australia
Autism Tasmania
Autism Northern Territory
Autism Aspergers Advocacy Australia
I am doing more research to find other sources as well a bit later. Hope you all find some of these links highly useful :)
Friday, March 9, 2012
Thank God for Technology!
Last night I got a bit spontaneous..... Pat is about to swing back out to sea next week and I realised that the 4 weeks he has been home we haven't been out to dinner or anything as a family so I thought screw it we're going. To most people this is somewhat of a normal adventure but for us it was a whole different ball game. We went out to a tavern that has a children's play area so we thought yep this place is the go. All in all we had a good night and I didn't feel the need to become intoxicated so that was a good sign lol.
I had to use my extreme negotiating skills when we first got there because Cal felt the need to take an Optimus Prime toy and his drink bottle into dinner with us. After 5 minutes of negotiating I managed to get him to put the drink bottle back in the car but he still took the toy. I told him I would buy him a drink so that made him happy. Just as we got inside Cal took the bolt into the gaming area. Pat explained to him that thats the adult playground and kids aren't allowed in there. When we got inside and were seated Cal didn't want to sit with us..... he's 6 years old and already we aren't cool enough lol. After a couple of minutes we convinced him to sit with us and he was all good. Then all 3 of them realised that there was a play area. We let them go off after we ordered (Patty supervised) and so far the night was doing alright.
All 3 kids wanted a cheeseburger and chips meal. The boys weren't too impressed when it came out and there was this stuff called salad on their burgers. All that Cal ended up eating was his chips and a few bites of the bun. Then the fun started. I was only a quarter of the way into my meal and Patty was about the same. Callum had finished what he wanted to eat then he wanted to bolt back into the play area. I couldn't see it from where we were sitting so it was out of the question........ right now all I wanted was to sit and finish my dinner and not have to deal with my 6 year old who was sitting on the floor trying to escape. Thank God for technology!!! I had to give him my iPhone. He was finished and determined that he was going and leaving us behind. Normally I would seriously frown at it but I just wanted to finish my dinner. At home when they finish they just put their plates in the sink then go and play. Can't do that at a pub. A week ago when my Mum and I were out at the shops we went to lunch and saw a family and all 3 boys were on an iPod Touch each. I was thinking OMG how sad. Mum and Dad were talking amongst themselves and these boys were just left there playing video games. I didn't want to give Callum my iPhone but I knew that it was going to be the only thing that stopped him attempting a runner. I decided that straight after dinner we would take them out for icecream. They didn't want to leave until I told them we were going to Maccas. I figured it was easier. I knew they weren't going to eat much of their dessert and just wanted to play. So after eating about 4 spoonfuls of their icecream each they were allowed to let loose in the playground at Maccas.
They were having a ball. There were other kids there they could play with and I was lucky enough to get talking to one of the parents there and she has a 13yo with Autism. She gave me some helpful hints of things I could do and it was fantastic talking to her. She knows exactly what I've been going through and let me in on the best bits with government departments that are yet to come with how helpful they are.
So a good night came to an end and I actually fell asleep by about 9.30pm because I was exhausted. Today we are doing some stuff around home but might go out a bit later. It is nice to actually be getting out as a family and doing things. As you can tell we don't get to do it very often.
I had to use my extreme negotiating skills when we first got there because Cal felt the need to take an Optimus Prime toy and his drink bottle into dinner with us. After 5 minutes of negotiating I managed to get him to put the drink bottle back in the car but he still took the toy. I told him I would buy him a drink so that made him happy. Just as we got inside Cal took the bolt into the gaming area. Pat explained to him that thats the adult playground and kids aren't allowed in there. When we got inside and were seated Cal didn't want to sit with us..... he's 6 years old and already we aren't cool enough lol. After a couple of minutes we convinced him to sit with us and he was all good. Then all 3 of them realised that there was a play area. We let them go off after we ordered (Patty supervised) and so far the night was doing alright.
All 3 kids wanted a cheeseburger and chips meal. The boys weren't too impressed when it came out and there was this stuff called salad on their burgers. All that Cal ended up eating was his chips and a few bites of the bun. Then the fun started. I was only a quarter of the way into my meal and Patty was about the same. Callum had finished what he wanted to eat then he wanted to bolt back into the play area. I couldn't see it from where we were sitting so it was out of the question........ right now all I wanted was to sit and finish my dinner and not have to deal with my 6 year old who was sitting on the floor trying to escape. Thank God for technology!!! I had to give him my iPhone. He was finished and determined that he was going and leaving us behind. Normally I would seriously frown at it but I just wanted to finish my dinner. At home when they finish they just put their plates in the sink then go and play. Can't do that at a pub. A week ago when my Mum and I were out at the shops we went to lunch and saw a family and all 3 boys were on an iPod Touch each. I was thinking OMG how sad. Mum and Dad were talking amongst themselves and these boys were just left there playing video games. I didn't want to give Callum my iPhone but I knew that it was going to be the only thing that stopped him attempting a runner. I decided that straight after dinner we would take them out for icecream. They didn't want to leave until I told them we were going to Maccas. I figured it was easier. I knew they weren't going to eat much of their dessert and just wanted to play. So after eating about 4 spoonfuls of their icecream each they were allowed to let loose in the playground at Maccas.
They were having a ball. There were other kids there they could play with and I was lucky enough to get talking to one of the parents there and she has a 13yo with Autism. She gave me some helpful hints of things I could do and it was fantastic talking to her. She knows exactly what I've been going through and let me in on the best bits with government departments that are yet to come with how helpful they are.
So a good night came to an end and I actually fell asleep by about 9.30pm because I was exhausted. Today we are doing some stuff around home but might go out a bit later. It is nice to actually be getting out as a family and doing things. As you can tell we don't get to do it very often.
Sunday, March 4, 2012
The start to a new week
Well I have to say this weekend was pretty awesome! I had a great day out with Mum on Saturday and went shopping. Was nice to get out of the house without the kids. Having say that they each got a new pair of shoes and Pat got a new chopping board (when you're married to a chef kitchen buys are acceptable lol). Today the kids had a ball of fun. We went on a family picnic to the park and they wore themselves out on the play equipment. Callum had an absolute blast! We don't get out much as a family because normally by the time the weekend comes we are too exhausted to do anything. Either that or there is a million things at home to do. Here's some photos of the kids having fun (even the big kid I call my husband)
This is on a rope obstacle course thingy the kids were on it nearly all day! Wish I had one of these set up in the back yard lol.
A picture I got of Pat and Callum. Love this picture. Callum is sitting in the tree and Pat has to stand on the park table under it. Callum has no fear of heights by the looks of it. We found out because when we tried to get the same shot with his sister she refused to let go of her father lol.
This is my brother William. He loves getting his photo taken and by the looks of it had a pretty good day to.
So the weekend is over and it is the start of a new week. A biiiiiig long list of things to do already as we are enrolling Cal in a different school so we have to look at how we are going to transition him into a new place. He already has a couple of new friends that he used to go to Special School with so that should fingers crossed make it easier for me. I also brought some sewing supplies so I am going to experiment this week with a new hobby.
Ciao for now :)
Wednesday, February 29, 2012
Finally I am starting to understand my son
Well I have been quiet the last couple of days and admittedly they have been pretty full on lol. My house inspection went really well and I got approval to install a security screen on Callum's window so there is no chance he can jump or fall out! She asked me if we had a pool and I said no but where is the form to put in for one lol. It has been a fun ride I tell you what and only a couple of days have passed.
Cal's first EVER play in the playground at lunch yesterday with all the other kids 100% success and he had a ball! This was one of the biggest steps for him since he has started school because he was never given a chance to be included. Two thumbs up for yesterday! Here's hoping that tomorrow the same thing occurs. I want the best possible outcome for my son at school. Having say that after his psychologist appointment today my high hopes of his school started to tick me off again.
At his first appointment I was given a heap of paperwork for his school full of strategies to try and use when one of his triggers started and told them to give his psychologist a call. Three weeks later and she still hasn't heard from them. Patrick gave her Callum's Behaviour Support Plan and she has added to it which is good. Also found out today that Cal has no concept whatsoever about emotions :( or their meanings. This did kind of upset me. He doesn't understand what happy or sad or angry actually mean. My years of thinking he isnt so bad he will be fine is slowly dwindling out the window. My son needs help and fast. He can tell me that he is angry but doesnt understand why and its heartbreaking. There must be so much confusion going through that little guys head.
Fingers crossed within the next couple of days the CAT-Kit that I brought arrives and that should help a lot. Once I sit down with Callum and work through it I will give everyone a report on how it is working out. I have also brought him a squishy stress ball to help him when he gets frustrated but he thinks it is just a toy so that will definately be one we have to work on. I am still on the hunt for a good Occupational Therapist and am getting absolutely nowhere. I have an interview with one of the HOSES at a nearby school with a proper SEU in the school on Friday so will see how that pans out. Hopefully the future is starting to look brighter as of tomorrow :)
Cal's first EVER play in the playground at lunch yesterday with all the other kids 100% success and he had a ball! This was one of the biggest steps for him since he has started school because he was never given a chance to be included. Two thumbs up for yesterday! Here's hoping that tomorrow the same thing occurs. I want the best possible outcome for my son at school. Having say that after his psychologist appointment today my high hopes of his school started to tick me off again.
At his first appointment I was given a heap of paperwork for his school full of strategies to try and use when one of his triggers started and told them to give his psychologist a call. Three weeks later and she still hasn't heard from them. Patrick gave her Callum's Behaviour Support Plan and she has added to it which is good. Also found out today that Cal has no concept whatsoever about emotions :( or their meanings. This did kind of upset me. He doesn't understand what happy or sad or angry actually mean. My years of thinking he isnt so bad he will be fine is slowly dwindling out the window. My son needs help and fast. He can tell me that he is angry but doesnt understand why and its heartbreaking. There must be so much confusion going through that little guys head.
Fingers crossed within the next couple of days the CAT-Kit that I brought arrives and that should help a lot. Once I sit down with Callum and work through it I will give everyone a report on how it is working out. I have also brought him a squishy stress ball to help him when he gets frustrated but he thinks it is just a toy so that will definately be one we have to work on. I am still on the hunt for a good Occupational Therapist and am getting absolutely nowhere. I have an interview with one of the HOSES at a nearby school with a proper SEU in the school on Friday so will see how that pans out. Hopefully the future is starting to look brighter as of tomorrow :)
Monday, February 27, 2012
Oh So Tired....
Well it's gotten to that time of the day. Kids have been put to bed (even though it is obscenely obvious that they still have more energy than the energiser bunny). It's been a very tiring day and my work is not done. I have a house inspection tomorrow and didn't realise until today how bad the house and yard had gotten because of everything I had been dealing with over the last few weeks. I have been noticing how drained I have been because I have been going to bed super dooper early.
For the last couple of weeks Callum has been sleeping on his mattress on the floor. Why you may ask? In one of his massive meltdowns he broke his bed. We have been trying to work out a "meltdown proof" bed. So we decided on an ensemble. First he didn't want it when Pat took him to pick it up but he's come good now lol. His room is all set up and ready to be slept in which I am hoping that is what he is doing right now.
Today we have started a new week and I am still contemplating about what to do with his school. After what I was told this afternoon when Pat brought him home I am having doubts. Callum's classroom in on the 2nd storey of a building and I found out today that he was sitting on top of the port racks with his legs dangling off. Obviously they found a way to get him down without him getting harmed. But what the??? My whole body just shuddered when Pat told me about it. Why does my little guy have absolutely no sense of fear??? There are things I am scared of as an adult (main one being spiders ok I know you're laughing now) and he is fine just picks them up or squishes them for his sister when she is screaming like a banshee lol. His lack of fear amazes me and scares the living crap out of me at the same time.
Tomorrow will be his first lunchtime with his friends so Pat is going up to the school on standby just in case something happens while I wait around for the real estate to turn up. I am hoping he has a fantastic time and it is a great end to his school day at 11.30. Hopefully next week we can try for 12.30 he stays until. He is slowly but surely getting there with school. I didn't get a phone call to come and get him earlier than I should have (even though the port rack incident probably should've qualified) but they are starting to figure out strategies with him which is good.
Only a short blog tonight as I am buggered fingers crossed after he gets home from school tomorrow I will have a whole lot of positives to write about!
Night Night everyone :)
For the last couple of weeks Callum has been sleeping on his mattress on the floor. Why you may ask? In one of his massive meltdowns he broke his bed. We have been trying to work out a "meltdown proof" bed. So we decided on an ensemble. First he didn't want it when Pat took him to pick it up but he's come good now lol. His room is all set up and ready to be slept in which I am hoping that is what he is doing right now.
Today we have started a new week and I am still contemplating about what to do with his school. After what I was told this afternoon when Pat brought him home I am having doubts. Callum's classroom in on the 2nd storey of a building and I found out today that he was sitting on top of the port racks with his legs dangling off. Obviously they found a way to get him down without him getting harmed. But what the??? My whole body just shuddered when Pat told me about it. Why does my little guy have absolutely no sense of fear??? There are things I am scared of as an adult (main one being spiders ok I know you're laughing now) and he is fine just picks them up or squishes them for his sister when she is screaming like a banshee lol. His lack of fear amazes me and scares the living crap out of me at the same time.
Tomorrow will be his first lunchtime with his friends so Pat is going up to the school on standby just in case something happens while I wait around for the real estate to turn up. I am hoping he has a fantastic time and it is a great end to his school day at 11.30. Hopefully next week we can try for 12.30 he stays until. He is slowly but surely getting there with school. I didn't get a phone call to come and get him earlier than I should have (even though the port rack incident probably should've qualified) but they are starting to figure out strategies with him which is good.
Only a short blog tonight as I am buggered fingers crossed after he gets home from school tomorrow I will have a whole lot of positives to write about!
Night Night everyone :)
Friday, February 24, 2012
The People In Your Life
Today isn't necessarily a blog about ASD just one in general I wanted to write. It's about the people who have come in and out of my life. Every single person that you meet is there to serve a purpose. Whether it be to teach us a lesson (whether it good or bad), to help us, for us to be there for, for a shoulder for us to cry on. This list goes on and I would be here forever. I have a small group of friends who I am extremely grateful for. They understand me. My mood swings (which haven't been too bad of late), they are there for a shoulder to cry on when I need one and trust me all of them have seen a lot of my tears over the years and best of yet to have a great laugh with. They are all different in their each individual ways (no point having a heap of friends that are all the same right?) and I love them for it. I hope everyone who reads this has a group of friends that they can find support in.
Next is my family. On my side I don't have a huge family as I am only one of three kids but it is full of so much love. My Mum and Dad have been together for nearly 30 years. I have a younger sister Emma and a younger brother William. Mum and Dad know all too well what Pat and I are going through. William has Downsyndrome. Over the years I have learnt from my parents that being myself should be good enough for everyone. If it isn't then they aren't worth knowing. Best advice I have probably ever been given. My parents show a sense of understanding to all 3 of us kids as we are all so very very different from each other. Mum and Dad have helped so much with Callum it has been awesome! I don't know what I would do without either of them.
Last but not least is my husband Patrick. We have been together for 8 and a half years and its been a rollercoaster just about the whole time lol. He's my rock and stands by everything that I do and I love him for it. He understands me better than just about anyone. He knows when to pester me to find out whats wrong, when to hug me, when to leave me to my own devices. Well most of the time anyway lol. He sacrifices spending time with his family so we can have a better life. Working away from your family for so many weeks on end is pretty gutsy if you ask me. I know how hard it is. He is away in somewhat isolation and I get to play the single mum gig for a few weeks. Not always a ball of fun that's for sure but you know what they say absence makes the heart grow fonder and they were right about that one. The best days are seeing the looks on the kids faces when they realise dad is home. It's a Kodak moment every time. Thank you so much hunnie xxoo
Thank you to every person who has come into my life whether it be friends or family, doctors, therapists, teachers or whoever. They have all done something to make me who I am today.
Next is my family. On my side I don't have a huge family as I am only one of three kids but it is full of so much love. My Mum and Dad have been together for nearly 30 years. I have a younger sister Emma and a younger brother William. Mum and Dad know all too well what Pat and I are going through. William has Downsyndrome. Over the years I have learnt from my parents that being myself should be good enough for everyone. If it isn't then they aren't worth knowing. Best advice I have probably ever been given. My parents show a sense of understanding to all 3 of us kids as we are all so very very different from each other. Mum and Dad have helped so much with Callum it has been awesome! I don't know what I would do without either of them.
Last but not least is my husband Patrick. We have been together for 8 and a half years and its been a rollercoaster just about the whole time lol. He's my rock and stands by everything that I do and I love him for it. He understands me better than just about anyone. He knows when to pester me to find out whats wrong, when to hug me, when to leave me to my own devices. Well most of the time anyway lol. He sacrifices spending time with his family so we can have a better life. Working away from your family for so many weeks on end is pretty gutsy if you ask me. I know how hard it is. He is away in somewhat isolation and I get to play the single mum gig for a few weeks. Not always a ball of fun that's for sure but you know what they say absence makes the heart grow fonder and they were right about that one. The best days are seeing the looks on the kids faces when they realise dad is home. It's a Kodak moment every time. Thank you so much hunnie xxoo
Thank you to every person who has come into my life whether it be friends or family, doctors, therapists, teachers or whoever. They have all done something to make me who I am today.
Thursday, February 23, 2012
Keeping My Cool
Well it has been a fun day today. Callum had a massive meltdown and refused to get dressed for school. When we made him he then proceeded to strip off naked and wouldn't put even a pair of shorts on let alone his uniform. We have had things thrown about the house, furniture pushed into walls and one very angry little boy. Something has to give right? I kept my cool. He was obviously frustrated and no matter how much I or Pat tried, things were definately not going to go our way this morning.
Finally at about 10am he had calmed down and gotten dressed. Thank God for that. I was getting worried I would have to chase the nudie run kid back inside all day. A few weeks ago the morning I had would've made me snap and breakdown and cry. It was full on to say the least. A fortnight ago I swallowed my pride and admitted I needed help. Anyone who knows me knows that I am pretty good at keeping up the happy routine. I am very good at pretending nothing is wrong when all I wanted to do some nights was go to sleep and never wake up. It is hard work and some days I just felt seriously underqualified for the job. I finally went on antidepressants. I don't know how I have gone so long without them.
I am not saying that they are a miracle cure but they have helped me so much. I never realised how much of an angry person I was. Angry at myself, my children, my husband and just about everyone around me. I was ready to explode at a moments notice. Now I manage to keep my cool. I am a much calmer person that doesn't appear to be so highly strung. I am back to my philosophy to take each day as it comes. As a parent with a child with ASD everything is so predictable yet unpredictable.
Now to the next section of my day....
We had a meeting with Callum's school principal about what the next step it. Finally I got asked for my opinion on what to do with my child. What I think would be good for him PLUS his Behaviour Management Plan that I have been waiting for since the start of school. Callum started grade 1 this year with nothing. No social stories were made for him (which the school found last year was to be highly successful) and they are going to do one up for him now. His main triggers at school are handwriting and cutting. So we discussed other alternatives on occasion for him for handwriting. Now my main want for Callum.... Inclusion. For the last year and a bit Callum hasn't ever gone out in the playground with his school friends to play at lunchtime. Now while down at the Special Education Unit he just gets frustrated and doesn't want to be there. Why is my little guy not even given a chance to play at lunch. I am at the point now where it is just starting to piss me off. Every child with a disability is entitled to inclusion at school. So now I finally have it. Tuesday at lunch Pat and I will both be up there (not watching him but on standby just in case something does happen because I have a runner) and he will be able to eat lunch with his classmates and play in the playground. Not much to most parents but a heck of a lot to me.
We are taking baby steps. One day at a time. Hopefully next week the ball gets rolling.
Finally at about 10am he had calmed down and gotten dressed. Thank God for that. I was getting worried I would have to chase the nudie run kid back inside all day. A few weeks ago the morning I had would've made me snap and breakdown and cry. It was full on to say the least. A fortnight ago I swallowed my pride and admitted I needed help. Anyone who knows me knows that I am pretty good at keeping up the happy routine. I am very good at pretending nothing is wrong when all I wanted to do some nights was go to sleep and never wake up. It is hard work and some days I just felt seriously underqualified for the job. I finally went on antidepressants. I don't know how I have gone so long without them.
I am not saying that they are a miracle cure but they have helped me so much. I never realised how much of an angry person I was. Angry at myself, my children, my husband and just about everyone around me. I was ready to explode at a moments notice. Now I manage to keep my cool. I am a much calmer person that doesn't appear to be so highly strung. I am back to my philosophy to take each day as it comes. As a parent with a child with ASD everything is so predictable yet unpredictable.
Now to the next section of my day....
We had a meeting with Callum's school principal about what the next step it. Finally I got asked for my opinion on what to do with my child. What I think would be good for him PLUS his Behaviour Management Plan that I have been waiting for since the start of school. Callum started grade 1 this year with nothing. No social stories were made for him (which the school found last year was to be highly successful) and they are going to do one up for him now. His main triggers at school are handwriting and cutting. So we discussed other alternatives on occasion for him for handwriting. Now my main want for Callum.... Inclusion. For the last year and a bit Callum hasn't ever gone out in the playground with his school friends to play at lunchtime. Now while down at the Special Education Unit he just gets frustrated and doesn't want to be there. Why is my little guy not even given a chance to play at lunch. I am at the point now where it is just starting to piss me off. Every child with a disability is entitled to inclusion at school. So now I finally have it. Tuesday at lunch Pat and I will both be up there (not watching him but on standby just in case something does happen because I have a runner) and he will be able to eat lunch with his classmates and play in the playground. Not much to most parents but a heck of a lot to me.
We are taking baby steps. One day at a time. Hopefully next week the ball gets rolling.
Being Strong
I have always been a big believer that you are only dealt what you can handle in life. Lately I have been doubting that. I knew that being a parent was going to be exhausting. I was never going to have the full on care free life I used to have when I was a teenager. If I could go back to living at home being a checkout chick and paying $50 a week in board to mum and dad some days I wish I could. You don't find out until you face the big bad world how sweet it is as home.
When the twins were babies, Pat was working as a chef so worked horrid hours. I learnt to deal. When they were born his employers were nice enough to give him a whole 4 days off (funnily enough, one of his workmates also had twins that were born 2 weeks after ours so both of them missed out). As they were going from babies to toddlers I was one of those parents who used to brag about how good my kids were. They were angels and could do no wrong. Yes I was one of THOSE parents lol. I have to admit they were pretty good. I cleared the terrible 2's without a worry. I had another baby and things were actually running rather smoothly. After we had Noah, Pat decided that he was going to put cooking on hold for a few years and actually get to know his family. He got a factory job (which believe it or not paid more than being a qualified chef). Monday to Friday and we loved it. We could do things as a family on weekends, no more split shifts and it was great.
The changes we have seen in Callum have been astonishing. The child who barely spoke was now putting whole sentences together and even singing! The first song I ever heard him sing was "Hot and Cold" by Katy Perry when it was the theme song to Masterchef. I sat there and cried. I've never heard him sing along to a song before. From there on his talking got better and better.
July 2010 we decided to take the next journey in our life and Pat now works away from home offshore as a chef. He missed cooking. I was under the misconception of "I will be fine", "I'm a tough cookie". Admittedly most of the time I have been but I have been too busy to notice how much of an emotional toll everything was taking on me.
In the last year and a half Callum has gotten used to Dad working away from home. He knows when we take daddy to the airport he goes to work. I now have a small insight into what it feels like to play mum and dad on my own. Let me tell you what I take my hat off to all the single parents out there because it's bloody hard! His first swing out was 8 weeks long. I thought by the end of it the ground had opened up and I had been sucked into hell. I had no idea how much control I had lost with my children. They thought they ran the place. Who are these small demons that are ripping through my house. When Pat started working away it was just before the twins started Prep. Callum started in the 4th term of 2010 at a special school for his language 2 days a week. It made a heck of a difference. He continued to go to special school for two days a week as a help to transition him into the mainstream school he attends.
2011 was a fantastic year for us. Well to an extent anyway. Both Callum and Rhiannon started Prep and they were both loving it. There was so much support for him. The special school got him Speech Therapy and Occupational Therapy (which he still really needs). He had social stories made to transition him through each major change that happened throughout school. He thrived on routine. I thought last year was absolutely fantastic. Until the start of this year.......
When the twins were babies, Pat was working as a chef so worked horrid hours. I learnt to deal. When they were born his employers were nice enough to give him a whole 4 days off (funnily enough, one of his workmates also had twins that were born 2 weeks after ours so both of them missed out). As they were going from babies to toddlers I was one of those parents who used to brag about how good my kids were. They were angels and could do no wrong. Yes I was one of THOSE parents lol. I have to admit they were pretty good. I cleared the terrible 2's without a worry. I had another baby and things were actually running rather smoothly. After we had Noah, Pat decided that he was going to put cooking on hold for a few years and actually get to know his family. He got a factory job (which believe it or not paid more than being a qualified chef). Monday to Friday and we loved it. We could do things as a family on weekends, no more split shifts and it was great.
The changes we have seen in Callum have been astonishing. The child who barely spoke was now putting whole sentences together and even singing! The first song I ever heard him sing was "Hot and Cold" by Katy Perry when it was the theme song to Masterchef. I sat there and cried. I've never heard him sing along to a song before. From there on his talking got better and better.
July 2010 we decided to take the next journey in our life and Pat now works away from home offshore as a chef. He missed cooking. I was under the misconception of "I will be fine", "I'm a tough cookie". Admittedly most of the time I have been but I have been too busy to notice how much of an emotional toll everything was taking on me.
In the last year and a half Callum has gotten used to Dad working away from home. He knows when we take daddy to the airport he goes to work. I now have a small insight into what it feels like to play mum and dad on my own. Let me tell you what I take my hat off to all the single parents out there because it's bloody hard! His first swing out was 8 weeks long. I thought by the end of it the ground had opened up and I had been sucked into hell. I had no idea how much control I had lost with my children. They thought they ran the place. Who are these small demons that are ripping through my house. When Pat started working away it was just before the twins started Prep. Callum started in the 4th term of 2010 at a special school for his language 2 days a week. It made a heck of a difference. He continued to go to special school for two days a week as a help to transition him into the mainstream school he attends.
2011 was a fantastic year for us. Well to an extent anyway. Both Callum and Rhiannon started Prep and they were both loving it. There was so much support for him. The special school got him Speech Therapy and Occupational Therapy (which he still really needs). He had social stories made to transition him through each major change that happened throughout school. He thrived on routine. I thought last year was absolutely fantastic. Until the start of this year.......
Wednesday, February 22, 2012
Where it began
Hi everyone. My name is Sarah and I am 27 years old at present. I am a stay at home mum to three beautiful children aged 6, 6 and 4. I have a wonderful husband who does everything he can to provide for our family. We live on the northside of Brisbane, QLD, Australia. One of my children has Autism. Welcome to my blog.
On the 6th of September 2005, my husband Patrick and I were made the very proud parents of twins. I couldn't believe it. We did it. We created not just one magical human being but two at the same time. The most overwhelming feeling swept over me. Amazement. Look what we did. At that time we lived with my Mum and Dad who helped us out so much with them. I never realised how much harder it was having 2 babies compared to 1 was (having say that I don't know any different). The twins were an April Fools Joke gone wrong lol I told everyone as a joke that I was pregnant with twins on April Fools Day. However when I got my first ultrasound done just before my 21st birthday, I found out I was having twins. By the way its the last time I have ever played an April Fools Joke on anyone.
Everything was awesome. By the time the twins were 3 months old we were living in a small unit a few houses away from mum and dad. The twins were starting to settle and sleep through the night by 4 months. I thought I had everything down pat lol. Just after Callum and Rhiannon turned 1 I found out I was pregnant again. I had an ultrasound at 5 weeks to make sure that we were only having one baby this time lol. I was told that there was an 80% chance beforehand that there could either be twins or triplets in there. So as you can imagine I totally freaked out. But luckily for us on the 17th of August 2007 baby Noah was born. The twins were 3 weeks off turning 2 when I had him. It was a ball of fun for us.
I had the twins in Family Day Care which I absolutely love. By the time Noah was 2 months old he was going as well (I trust these woman with my other 2 kids so why wouldn't I trust them with my baby). I am really glad I did that with him because when I put Callum in at just over 1 we had big separation issues for a while. By the time the twins were 3 Rhiannon was a little chatterbox while it was noticed that Callum was quite happy just to sit quietly. A few people said to me "Oh she is just doing the talking for him". He wasn't as talkative and couldn't string a sentence together. Luckily I followed my instincts and got his hearing checked out. Turns out he needed grommets/tubes put in his ears because he could barely hear us.
This is where the fun began......
I was told by doctors that once his ears were fixed his behaviour will be awesome because now he can hear what was going on around him and what we were saying to him. The opposite happened. He started lashing out and getting frustrated. Both Patrick and I were completely baffled as to what was wrong with him. We took him to go and see The Wiggles a couple of months after he got his hearing fixed and he had (what I now know today) was his first major meltdown. He hadn't been diagnosed with Autism at this stage so we didn't know what was wrong or what was happening in the mind of my poor little guy.
We started to see a child psychologist where we did the Triple P parenting course. Throughout this she came out and observed Callum and she was the one that started the ball rolling that he was ASD. I am so glad to this day that she did. On the 1st of September 2010, Callum was diagnosed with Autistic Spectrum Disorder. I was actually relieved. I had an answer now I had to figure out how my little guy ticked. To this day I am still trying to find it out.
On the 6th of September 2005, my husband Patrick and I were made the very proud parents of twins. I couldn't believe it. We did it. We created not just one magical human being but two at the same time. The most overwhelming feeling swept over me. Amazement. Look what we did. At that time we lived with my Mum and Dad who helped us out so much with them. I never realised how much harder it was having 2 babies compared to 1 was (having say that I don't know any different). The twins were an April Fools Joke gone wrong lol I told everyone as a joke that I was pregnant with twins on April Fools Day. However when I got my first ultrasound done just before my 21st birthday, I found out I was having twins. By the way its the last time I have ever played an April Fools Joke on anyone.
Everything was awesome. By the time the twins were 3 months old we were living in a small unit a few houses away from mum and dad. The twins were starting to settle and sleep through the night by 4 months. I thought I had everything down pat lol. Just after Callum and Rhiannon turned 1 I found out I was pregnant again. I had an ultrasound at 5 weeks to make sure that we were only having one baby this time lol. I was told that there was an 80% chance beforehand that there could either be twins or triplets in there. So as you can imagine I totally freaked out. But luckily for us on the 17th of August 2007 baby Noah was born. The twins were 3 weeks off turning 2 when I had him. It was a ball of fun for us.
I had the twins in Family Day Care which I absolutely love. By the time Noah was 2 months old he was going as well (I trust these woman with my other 2 kids so why wouldn't I trust them with my baby). I am really glad I did that with him because when I put Callum in at just over 1 we had big separation issues for a while. By the time the twins were 3 Rhiannon was a little chatterbox while it was noticed that Callum was quite happy just to sit quietly. A few people said to me "Oh she is just doing the talking for him". He wasn't as talkative and couldn't string a sentence together. Luckily I followed my instincts and got his hearing checked out. Turns out he needed grommets/tubes put in his ears because he could barely hear us.
This is where the fun began......
I was told by doctors that once his ears were fixed his behaviour will be awesome because now he can hear what was going on around him and what we were saying to him. The opposite happened. He started lashing out and getting frustrated. Both Patrick and I were completely baffled as to what was wrong with him. We took him to go and see The Wiggles a couple of months after he got his hearing fixed and he had (what I now know today) was his first major meltdown. He hadn't been diagnosed with Autism at this stage so we didn't know what was wrong or what was happening in the mind of my poor little guy.
We started to see a child psychologist where we did the Triple P parenting course. Throughout this she came out and observed Callum and she was the one that started the ball rolling that he was ASD. I am so glad to this day that she did. On the 1st of September 2010, Callum was diagnosed with Autistic Spectrum Disorder. I was actually relieved. I had an answer now I had to figure out how my little guy ticked. To this day I am still trying to find it out.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)