Keeping My Cool

Well it has been a fun day today.  Callum had a massive meltdown and refused to get dressed for school.  When we made him he then proceeded to strip off naked and wouldn't put even a pair of shorts on let alone his uniform.  We have had things thrown about the house, furniture pushed into walls and one very angry little boy.  Something has to give right? I kept my cool.  He was obviously frustrated and no matter how much I or Pat tried, things were definately not going to go our way this morning.

Finally at about 10am he had calmed down and gotten dressed.  Thank God for that.  I was getting worried I would have to chase the nudie run kid back inside all day.  A few weeks ago the morning I had would've made me snap and breakdown and cry.  It was full on to say the least.  A fortnight ago I swallowed my pride and admitted I needed help.  Anyone who knows me knows that I am pretty good at keeping up the happy routine.  I am very good at pretending nothing is wrong when all I wanted to do some nights was go to sleep and never wake up.  It is hard work and some days I just felt seriously underqualified for the job.  I finally went on antidepressants.  I don't know how I have gone so long without them.

I am not saying that they are a miracle cure but they have helped me so much.  I never realised how much of an angry person I was.  Angry at myself, my children, my husband and just about everyone around me.  I was ready to explode at a moments notice.  Now I manage to keep my cool.  I am a much calmer person that doesn't appear to be so highly strung. I am back to my philosophy to take each day as it comes.  As a parent with a child with ASD everything is so predictable yet unpredictable.

Now to the next section of my day....

We had a meeting with Callum's school principal about what the next step it.  Finally I got asked for my opinion on what to do with my child.  What I think would be good for him PLUS his Behaviour Management Plan that I have been waiting for since the start of school.  Callum started grade 1 this year with nothing.  No social stories were made for him (which the school found last year was to be highly successful) and they are going to do one up for him now.  His main triggers at school are handwriting and cutting.  So we discussed other alternatives on occasion for him for handwriting.  Now my main want for Callum.... Inclusion.  For the last year and a bit Callum hasn't ever gone out in the playground with his school friends to play at lunchtime.  Now while down at the Special Education Unit he just gets frustrated and doesn't want to be there.  Why is my little guy not even given a chance to play at lunch.  I am at the point now where it is just starting to piss me off.  Every child with a disability is entitled to inclusion at school.  So now I finally have it.  Tuesday at lunch Pat and I will both be up there (not watching him but on standby just in case something does happen because I have a runner) and he will be able to eat lunch with his classmates and play in the playground.  Not much to most parents but a heck of a lot to me. 

We are taking baby steps.  One day at a time.  Hopefully next week the ball gets rolling.